Life’s Not Fair!
“That’s just not fair!” I actually heard someone say this. This particular someone was an adult. Perhaps even older than me…They said it like they meant it.
I wanted to tap them on the shoulder and say, “Hell-O?! You’re quite right, so why are you being so surprised and indignant as if this is a new realization?”
Life IS not fair.
If one is looking for fair, Life would be the wrong place to be looking for it.
This does not mean that we should not strive for equality, justice and fairness in all our dealings with each other. But it does mean that when my tire goes flat, it rains on my parade or other seeming ‘unfairnesses’ occur, my one and only response should be, “Yes.” And then. “Thank you.”
Saying yes to whatever is happening lets my mind/body know that THIS is the current state of affairs. It helps me accept what is in front of me rather than railing against it. This, thisness in front of me, IS.
By saying yes, I then have an opportunity to choose my action.
Notice I didn’t say choose my reaction. Because I think my usual reaction is something akin to a freaked-out two-year old. But if I accept the reality of my circumstances by saying a silent thank you, and IF I don’t default to my tantrum-ridden anxiety-mishapen hard-wiring, I have the grace, those few extra moments, to choose how I want to act.
The thank you is also my chance to try to be grateful for what is likely to be (yet another!?) sorely-needed lesson in patience.
This, my friends, is akin to mastery on an epic level.
Don’t I sound perfect? Kind of Zen-like as I grace all in my presence with my Yeses and Thank Yous, not to mention my innate wisdom whilst being all-Buddha-like in my acceptance?
Unfortunately, there are witnesses to some of my alternative behaviour that might provide a counter view.
I’m getting better at it. Getting better at paying attention at the opportunities between The Situation and My Actions.
Almost like a grown-up. Almost like I understand that…
Life is not fair.